Humorous Shorts
by Elphaba'sGirl
Summary: This is a collection of one shots written by my most awesome of brothers... Years and years and years ago. Includes; Frex Dies, and Galinda's Elephant, among others.
1. Frex Dies (I)

**This is a story written by my brother a few years back... We were digging through our old writing stuff. This is from the era when I was obsessed with wicked (actually that era is now...) and I kinda forced him to be obsessed too.**

**This is a story about how Frex dies, based on "Famous Last Words" the YouTube video. ( watch?v=jpdOyoqsXzo) there is also a second one... And a third one... Though I wrote the second one.**

**Anyway, neither my brother nor I own wicked or famous last words.**

* * *

It all started on Nessa's birthday, and Frex tried to light the candles.

"Wait, is that our wood floor? Oh well!" Frex said as he lit the floor on fire with a super powered lighter. He looked around for Elphaba but she was getting Nessa a present at Wozmart.

"Nessa! The fire extinguisher is out! Get the hairspray!"

"Why?"

"Just get it!"

"Okay."

Nessa brought Frex her hairspray.

"Yes! The perfect tool!"

Frex began to spray the hairspray upon the growing flame.

"Why isn't it working?"

"Nessa, bring me more hairspray!"

"I can't!"

"Why?"

"You sprayed it all on the fire."

"Oh, I'll call Elphaba to get some at Wozmart. No; no time for that, I'll just eat it!"

A large fireball consumed Frex.

"Nessa! Why do I feel like I'm dying- oh wait..."

* * *

Elphaba was heading home, and stopped in front of the house.

"Wait, why is the house on fire? Oh well, nothing I liked in there anyway. Except for that snake…"

* * *

Meanwhile...

* * *

"Nessa, why is the snake attacking me?!"

"Maybe he likes you."

Frex and Nessa died. Elphaba danced on the rubbish from the house singing "ding dong my family's dead!"

**there was also originally a picture in the notebook of and Nessa's grave and Elphaba dancing on it. It was inscribed with "RIT" standing for rest in terror. **


	2. Frex Dies (II)

**Hi guys! Here's the next one. Written by yours truley (or, my brother... Years and years ago after the first time we saw wicked)**

Frex and Nessa were outside on a hot day with a bottle of ammonia (A/N in the original ammonia was called pneumonia) and a bottle of bleach.

"What are we doing father?" Nessa asked Frex.

"We are mixing ammonia and bleach!" Frex answered.

"Doesn't that kill the human race in one single blow?"

"Yes but we are doing it anyway."

"Well hurry up I don't want to be late for my anger management classes!" Nessa said.

"Okay, okay," said Frex.

Frex dumped the ammonia and the bleach into a bucket.

"I think we are going to need gas masks!" Nessa said.

"Uh… I don't need a gas mask, I've had gas before!"

Before Nessa could get inside to get gas masks they both fell to the ground in pain.

"What is that burning sensation in my lungs?" Frex asked.

"It's the ammonia and bleach!" Nessa screamed "maybe water will help!"

Frex then drank the ammonia and bleach. Frex and Nessa both died.


	3. Galinda's Elephant

**Next one...**

Elphaba was reading a book on her bed when…

"ELPHIE!"

She was startled and nearly fell off the bed. "Yes, Glin?"

"Help me get my bag through the door!"  
After five minutes pushing and pulling the two girls managed to get the bag through the door.

"What is in that?" Elphaba asked.

"My new friend!" Galinda answered.

"Well, now that we got your friend through the door I'm getting back to my book." Elphaba said panting.

"NO!" Galinda yelled. "You need to help me name him."

"Okay how about Bill-"

"NO!" Galinda yelled. "That is no name for him."

"Well, may I see him?" Elphaba asked.

"Sure." Galinda pulled out a giant pink elephant.

Elphaba stared at it in awe.

"Isn't he cute?" Galinda asked.

"Um sure," Elphaba stammered. "What about Pink-"

"Okay!" Galinda interrupted. "His name is Pink."

"I wasn't finished."

"I don't care!"

So for the rest of the school year Galinda had a 3 foot tall pink elephant in the room.

In other words, Elphaba woke up in fright for the rest of the school year.


End file.
